


Guillermo, Could You Come To My Room Later?

by TheFakeBlondeOne



Series: Who We Married In the Shadows [2]
Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: Light Angst, Love, M/M, Marriage, Marriage Proposal, Suggestive Themes, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:34:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24367375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFakeBlondeOne/pseuds/TheFakeBlondeOne
Summary: Nandor has something to say
Relationships: Guillermo/Nandor the Relentless (What We Do in the Shadows TV)
Series: Who We Married In the Shadows [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1799155
Comments: 15
Kudos: 89





	1. Chapter 1

Nandor was nervous, he was really fucking nervous. If his heart still beat it would have stopped already. He paced in the room and stopped in front of a table that contained photographs of Guillermo. He stopped to look at his favorite one, Guillermo was freshly turned; he was floating mid-air stabilizing himself with the handrails of the stairs, his fangs were visible as he was laughing in the shot. He looked at this picture for a long time and then at the box in his hand, thumbing the velvet lining as if trying to concentrate and form some concrete line of thought. Whatever line was forming was broken by the soft knock on the door. Shit.

“Sweetie are you in there, can I come in?” Asked Guillermo.

“Of course, Guillermo, you know you never need to ask to come in here. Consider this room yours.” In the back of Nandor’s mind a small voice seemed to say, ‘that is if he accepts your proposal’. This thought brought a chill down Nandor’s spine, he composed himself as soon as Guillermo opened the door.

“Oh wow! You look, gorgeous sweetie, are you headed somewhere after we talk?”

“What are you going on about Guillermo, I’m not going anywhere unless that’s your way of asking me to go someplace nice and drink some people” responded Nandor with some pride in the compliment Guillermo paid him, he was dressed up in his fanciest clothes he owned plus his hair was styled in a fancy braid. 

“I might just have to, you look really nice,” said Guillermo wrapping his arms around Nandor and giving him a quick peck on the cheek. He loved when Nandor dressed up and he especially loved dressing him up as well as dressing him down occasionally. He was impressed by the braids as well and was going to ask who braided his hair when he felt his partner tense up.

“Nandor, honey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing dearest Guillermo”, this was a lie, Guillermo had almost graced the box he held hidden in his sleeve, “Come sit with me I want to talk about a thing.” He patted the armchair and Guillermo sat down first as Nandor stood in front of him. He started to feel weak in the knees thinking about what he was about to do. ‘Calm down you can do this, just get down on one knee like in the romance books and ask him to be yours for eternity’ he thought as he looked into Guillermo’s dark eyes. Getting lost in his lover’s worried gaze he finally cooled down; no, it was not the right time. He sat down next to Guillermo then took his hand giving it a soft kiss.

“Nandor, I’ll ask again, is everything alright?” asked Guillermo who was starting to feel anxious; what could possibly be bothering Nandor? A new vampire coming to the house? Some vampire hunters on the prowl? Laszlo bringing back another cursed item?

“Everything is fine my love, I just wanted to bestow upon you something important.”

Nandor decided to test the waters before proposing by giving Guillermo something he had saved for their familiar/master anniversary. He picked up a yellow envelope and gave it to a very confused Guillermo; what a pity he really wanted to see Guillermo’s face on their anniversary, but if it all worked out today, they would celebrate a better anniversary.

Guillermo opened the envelope and took out some papers, as he read them his face lit up like a neon sign. “You didn’t!” screamed Guillermo as he re-read the papers that detailed the price of a portrait commission for one Guillermo de la Cruz.

“I... did, can you not read the paper? Do you need new glasses, Guillermo dear” asked Nandor with some concern, he never heard of a vampire whose vision got worse after turning but he never knew any who wore glasses before.

“No, I’m fine, it’s an expression sweetie. But why give me something like this?”

“Because you are officially part of this house now, and everyone who is part of a vampire house needs their own portrait. Even Colin Robinson has portraits. It’s about time you have one made, as I said you are part of this house and you are part of my life as well.”

Guillermo looked at the papers again and then at Nandor. He felt so good at finally having his first portrait painted. He always dreamed of seeing an image of himself hanging on the walls of the house and Nandor had even commissioned an artist for this. Unable to contain his happiness he tightly hugged Nandor

“This is so thoughtful of you, Nandor, I love it, thank you so much,” said Guillermo, filled with love for the man sitting next to him. He never thought that Nandor would open himself so much to another person let alone his dopey former familiar. Meanwhile, Nandor felt himself feel lighter and something in his heart and in his mind clicked, it was time.

Guillermo put the papers aside to keep them safe and as he turned around to reward his lover with a big kiss he noticed Nandor wasn’t next to him anymore, he was on the floor, on one knee and with a small velvet box in hand and oh. Guillermo’s brain stopped functioning; it was currently frozen in shock at the scene in front of him. Tell him Nandor wanted to start a romantic relationship, this he could believe; Tell him Nandor had turned him into a vampire meaning that the tall vampire wanted to spend eternity with him, this he could understand. Tell him Nandor was kneeling in front of him with the obvious intention to ask him to spend the rest of their lives together as married partners, this would take some time. The only reaction he could make was a soft whimper which made Nandor feel so much more anxious than he already was.

Nandor tried to find any indication that Guillermo did not want this, something that signaled him to get up and stop making a damn fool out of himself. No such luck, Guillermo was like a statue, so Nandor had to muster whatever leftover conqueror strength he had left to open his mouth.

“Guillermo… I wanted to say that I… I-I love you. You came into my life as a temporary thing, you were to be a maid or butler slave, a rather attractive and irresistible one of course. But 10 years went by and my life became easier to live with you in it and after a while, I saw you as my friend and later as more than a friend. Then when you became my lover, I was not ready to love you as you deserved, I worked extremely hard to make sure that I was worthy of being your boyfriend lover man. And now that you are eternally mine, I can’t see another thing but what I want right now” 

Guillermo was bracing himself for something less life-changing, maybe Nandor wanted to ask him to pose for a tinier portrait that was box sized so he could carry it forever. Then Nandor busted that theory as he opened that velvet box and confessed “I can’t just stay as your boyfriend man or casual lover guy; I want to be your eternal husband. If you let me, I Nandor the Relentless, want to become Nandor de la Cruz”, he butchered Guillermo’s last name as he offered the two ornate matching rings. One for him and the other for Guillermo

Guillermo was stunned in the best way possible. Nandor wanted to marry him, carry his name, become his _**husband**_. That thought sent pleasing shivers down his spine. His mind started to wander to a happy matrimonial life; waking up together, filing taxes as a married couple, introducing each other as ‘this is my husband’, the honeymoon, the wedding, eternally together bound by a pair of rings. Guillermo’s mind was so busy with all the marital bliss he did not notice Nandor beginning to have a mental meltdown. His mind was filling up with the worst thoughts, reasons, and memories on why Guillermo was hesitant to say yes until Guillermo finally snapped out of his dreamlike trance and pounced on him and in turn snapped him out of his nightmare trance.

Laying on the floor with the weight of his lover on him was enough to make Nandor forget all the bad thoughts. Wanting to keep that weight on forever, Nandor wrapped his arms around Guillermo and just drank up all the happiness he was feeling, while Guillermo whispered sweet things in Spanish into Nandor’s ear. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours until Guillermo finally unhooked himself from Nandor and rested his elbows on either side of Nandor’s head, looking down at him with so much love in his heart.

“Should I take you crushing my bones as a yes?” Asked Nandor while enjoying the view. To answer Nandor’s question Guillermo gave Nandor the reward he owed him. The kiss was a lot more passionate than how Guillermo usually kissed but, in his conscience, it did not bother him at all as he nipped at Nandor’s lip. Nandor cupped Guillermo’s cheek with his free hand and deepened the kiss, savoring the sweet lips and captivating fragrance of his fiancé. Fuck he loved how that sounded! He moved his other hand to hold the back of Guillermo's head when he realized with all of the commotions, he had not put the ring on Guillermo’s finger. 

Painstakingly, Nandor broke away from the kiss and sat up grabbing Guillermo’s arm and helping him up too. Nandor opened the box again and while Guillermo gasped and covered his face with his hand Nandor took one ring out and reached for Guillermo's free hand, brought it to his lips, and began to pepper little kisses on the ring finger before gently placing the ring on. Guillermo could cry at the small weight that ring added to his finger, he began to plant kisses all over Nandor’s face and whispered in between kisses “I love you so, so, so, so, so, so, much Nandor, I want to be your husband. I want to wake up to love you for eternity.” 

Nandor felt so intoxicated that for a second, he really believed he downed a pint of drug blood before the proposal. He was high on love and his Guillermo, his head spun unable to fully grasp the situation: Guillermo said yes! After all of the waiting, the sleepless nights, the picking of the rings, the fear of rejection, after all of it he said yes! He was so elated he grabbed Guillermo's by his thighs and waist and spun him around the room. Guillermo started to laugh as he braced himself on to his soon to be husband.


	2. Let's Have White Flowers Hanging from The Ceiling Like in Breaking Dawn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nandor and Guillermo are getting married.

“Everyone! Mandatory house meeting!!!!” screamed Nandor excitedly while running to the stairs carrying a giggly Guillermo in his arms.

“What the fuck is up with the yelling?” grunted Laszlo who followed Nadja into the foyer.

“Seriously Nandor, do you want to wake up the whole neighborhood with your cat screeching?” hissed Nadja who looked disgusted as she saw Nandor carrying Guillermo like a precious vase, and he told her and Laszlo to get a coffin? The nerve.

“Colin Robinson! Get over here we have a house meeting!” screamed Nandor again as he wanted everybody in the house even that creepy doll Nadja always carried to hear the news.

“Seriously Nandor are you deaf? Is that why you screech like a fox who just got trampled by parade clowns?” asked Nadja as Colin entered the room. “Hey, did someone say something about a major body malfunction? Because I got some interesting statistics on medical recovery and neighborhoods with different social class-”

“Not now Colin Robinson. I have very important news to share with you all” interrupted Nandor “It is with the greatest honor and pride to announce that I and Guillermo are getting married!” bellowed Nandor while kissing Guillermo’s cheek.

“What!?” screeched Nadja in surprise. “Are you for real now, you Nandor the most stupid buffoon" Nadja gestured at Nandor "finally strapped on a pair and now you are going to be married?!?!?"

" I wouldn't put it so crudely but yeah," said Guillermo while perched on Nandor's arms the latter who could not answer as he was kissing down Guillermo's jaw.

"You maniacal son of a whore, you finally grew the balls and did it! Congratulations old chaps may your marriage be filled with true love, eternal trust, and many erotic adventures " Congratulated Laszlo at Nandor who was still kissing Guillermo.

"Wow... thank you, Laszlo. That's extremely sweet and sort of gross of you." Continued Guillermo while Nandor was going to town kissing Guillermo’s neck and shoulders.

“Congratulations guys, I hope you guys have a good marriage, even though statistics show that Staten Island divorce rate is slowly rising, I am 89 percent sure you guys can beat the curve,” commented Colin Robinson. At his comment, Nandor stopped smooching Guillermo and looked at him with a perplexed stare

“Why only 89 percent? That seems like a pretty low number,” complained Nandor, was this **fucking guy** for real?

“That's not a bad number it’s a higher percentage than most people will get from me in their whole life,” said Colin while his eyes glowed blue

“Still why not 100 percent? You didn't even give us a 90, you gave us an 89” 

“Well, I was just being realistic and taking into account the Valentine’s Day incident-”

“Will you let that go already?! That was a long time ago!” screamed Nandor, Guillermo rolled his eyes and rubbed Nandor’s shoulder trying to calm him down

“Both of you stop it, it is not the time for fighting it is time for celebrating!” screamed Nadja even louder.

“Yes! Let us rejoice with some fresh virgins”, intervened Laszlo, “Nandor you can let go of Gizmo now “

“No, it's fine"

" It's okay sweetie, I’m fine you can let go"

"No! I-it is a symbolic gesture, Guillermo. You have been carrying me and my burdens for years so now it is my turn to carry yours” Nandor explained as he opened the door and ducked a bit to not hit Guillermo on the head.

After drinking up some freshman frat house pledges the vampires came back to their home and sat together in the fancy room to discuss the wedding preparations. Guillermo was sitting on Nandor’s lap writing down a list of wedding ideas while Nadja and Laszlo were vetoing every single _Twilight-related_ idea that came from Nandor.

“Come on guys, there is nothing wrong with decorating the whole house with flowers, it worked for Bella.” pleaded Nandor 

“No, no, no. With all those flowers it'll smell like a Midsummer Festival’s butthole in here, besides, I've seen the color scheme and we are not plastering the whole house in white flowers” rejected Nadja while Guillermo scratched off the idea from the list. He did not find it too keen to have a _Twilight-inspired_ wedding either. His family would mock the hell out of him. 

Oh, that’s right his family would be there, his **human** family. The thought made Guillermo anxious, he kept in touch with them but not enough for them to know he was a vampire.

Sensing his partner tense up on his lap Nandor poked his head over Guillermo’s shoulder “Dearest Guillermo, are you alright? We do not have to get married in the woods if you do not want to. We can just hold the ceremony between two abandoned water tanks.”

“Nandor pardon my interruption on this matter but as a close acquaintance I beg of you not to get married between two abandoned water tanks because if you do, I'm uninviting myself,” added Laszlo 

“Actually... it's about inviting my family to the wedding… I'm just worried about what they expect of me and the wedding”

“I'm not understanding, what type of expectations do they have? Do they want a wedding at the beach during sunset!?” exclaimed Nandor in a panic “We cannot have that! We all will burn to death and I don't own any appropriate beach clothes.”

“I agree with Nandor, I know it’s your wedding, but a sunset beach wedding is not happening, besides, they are extremely tacky and overdone,” added Nadja.

“No, it's nothing like that, trust me my cousins hate that cheap telenovela stuff too. That's the problem my family likes traditional thing”

“What like banging on pots and pans outside the couple’s room when they’re having their first sex together? Well, I must confess I've been dying to participate in a good pot banging.” Said Laszlo sounding genuinely excited at the idea of banging pots outside Nandor and Guillermo’s room while they had sex.

"It's more like they expect more human stuff like a wedding cake, a big reception dinner, and the ceremony being held in an um…. church," said Guillermo, spitting out the word church with difficulty; already expecting the reaction Guillermo covered his ears as all the vampires hissed in a panic.

"Guillermo, I love you so very very, very, very, very, very, very, very, much" Guillermo tried to say something but Nandor interrupted "but I'm not participating in a wedding that involves any wedding cake of any kind" 

"Wedding cake?! That is where you draw the line? You would go inside a Catholic church, get married by a Catholic priest, and wear a big Catholic cro- cr- necklace?! But a wedding cake that's-that’s not happening." Rebutted Nadja with indignation at Nandor’s response. May the fates be kind to Guillermo because his future husband was a moron.

"For Guillermo, I would, " said Nandor in a defensive tone hugging Guillermo's waist. 

"I think it's better if we leave it here, it's been quite a night and it's almost morning time, but thank you for celebrating this night with us I appreciate it”

“You are very welcome Gizmo; we can continue our chat about the deflowering celebration at a later time,” said Laszlo sounding genuinely excited 

“Um... we can discuss something, “said Guillermo with an uncomfortable grimace” C’mon sweetie let's get ready for the night.” Guillermo got up and guided Nandor back to the taller vampire's room, the emotional events had left him tired and he needed to rest plus he wanted some private time with Nandor. 

He entered the room and checked to make sure all the curtains and windows were fit to block out the sun rays, Nandor was following his every movement specifically focusing on the ring on Guillermo’s finger. Oh, how he loved that short man, he could just look at him forever; Nandor could only think of the wedding, or more specifically of Guillermo all dressed up for the wedding. Feeling a bit bold, Nandor got up and went towards Guillermo and hugged him from behind he started to kiss Guillermo’s shoulder, his neck, the back of his head, his ears. Nandor felt Guillermo relax in his touch; he felt so warm and plenty he believed if Guillermo asked sweetly enough, he would allow a wedding cake; it could be a chocolate cake with four tiers and buttercream icing if he gave that cute smile Nandor loved to see. 

Guillermo turned around to face Nandor with the cute smile, Nandor’s knees buckled at the sight, then Guillermo said: “Hey, I realized something just now, when you and I get married you'll become an American citizen.” Suddenly for Nandor, the best night ever in all of his years in America just turned into the best night in his whole existence.

“Laszlo although I appreciate your input you are not permitted to bang pots on our honeymoon,” said Guillermo with a hint of disgust.

“What does a moon made of honey have to do with the banging ceremony? I just want to support my companions in celebration of first sexsual experience as a formally married couple by taking two pots and banging them together” cried Laszlo sounding indagated, why would Gizmo refuse him to share the moment with him? Did he already designate Nadja as the pot banger or worse Colin Robinson?!

“Listen Laszlo let me be clear here, the only banging there is going to be is not going to have more than two people involved and you are not one of those people. However, since you feel strongly about it, I'll let you bang pots together when Nandor and I get officially married by the ordained minister, okay?”

“I’ll accept your offer on this, but I get to choose the pans and or pots to bang” sternly declared Laszlo

“That's fine Laszlo just please don't follow us up to our room again, please. You are doing Colin Robinson a favor by behaving that way.”

With a disgusted shake of his head, Laszlo left asking Nadja if she had seen his good pots. There was only a week left until the wedding and Guillermo was freaking out; this was worse than the planning of the orgy; at least in the orgy nobody cared about all the minor details, there was only one thing to focus on but on this celebration nothing could be overlooked. At least the catering for the human guest was taken care of, but Guillermo was still nervous at the fact that his family could potentially find out about his “affliction”. To camouflage, his roommate's behavior and taste in decor the wedding was vampire-themed, or at least that is what it said in the invitations he sent to his family. It was decided the whole wedding was going to be done in the vampires' home and it was a short event; the excuse was that Colin Robinson had to go to work early and the “costumes” they rented out were due in the morning. 

“Guillermo, do you remember where we put the celebratory pots?” asked Nadja, seeing Guillermo’s stressing out she asked “Guillermo what's wrong? Is there something that I, your most maiden of honor can do to help?” Nadja had been chosen to become the maid of honor considering she was the only woman Guillermo knew who could handle both Nandor and Laszlo’s mood. At first, she was a bit acidic when he asked her but secretly, she screamed in her coffin with joy and as the wedding day drew closer, she made it her job, nay her obligation to make sure that everything ran smoothly.

“I’m fine it’s just the whole catering and entertainment for my relatives got me frazzled, I just need to make sure that all the mirrors in the common areas are covered or removed because if my grandma doesn't see any of our reflections she’ll try to call an exorcist again and my family can't take a ban from another gas station, they are driving from Jersey ” rambled Guillermo

“Calm yourself, Guillermo, I will make sure there are no mirrors near your grandmother, remember I can also hypnotize her should things go wrong,” said Nadja slightly patting Guillermo’s shoulder trying to calm him down.

“I don't know Nadja grandma is pretty crazy, I’d rather not risk it, besides my mom had issues with her when she was sane. I can't imagine what my mom would do if grandma became fully senile... and they can’t leave her at a home, not since she tore that nurse’s earring off” 

“Okay, I understand I'll just leave the mirrors in the bathrooms and cover up the one’s in the hall, also I’ll make sure the food servers wear stud earrings” nodded Nadja.

“Thank you so much Nadja, my savior,” said Guillermo truly grateful that Nadja was there. They were interrupted by a loud accented voice.

“Guillermo dearest your strong handsome and powerful fiancé has arrived with the certificates” announced Nandor as he entered the foyer followed by Colin Robinson and Laszlo

“Oh, thank you sweetie!” said Guillermo as he ran into Nandor’s arms. To that Nandor gave Guillermo a big kiss on his cheeks and lips.

“Wow! By the looks of it, you guys are ready to get hitched right here right now. You might as well forget this whole thing and elo-” Colin Robinson was interrupted by Guillermo grabbing him by the collar and pointing his pen an inch away from his jugular.

“Do not! Do not even try to finish that sentence! Okay, mister Robinson?” threatened Guillermo with a frantic tone in his voice, Colin just looked on in terror while the rest of the vampires seemed frozen in fear, in reality, Nadja and Laszlo were stunned with a mix of admiration and fear and Nandor was paralyzed by another type of feeling, a very nice feeling. 

“Okay” whispered Colin, sighing in relief when Guillermo released his collar

“Alright…Well I’m going to take a look at these documents c’mon Nandor” said Guillermo as he walked upstairs, Nandor did not move an inch until Laszlo stepped on his foot to get him to react, after swearing at Laszlo he ran after Guillermo.

“There you are, are you okay?” asked Guillermo before Nandor wrapped his arms around his short lover and kissed him passionately. His hands moved to cup his Guillermo’s cheeks deepening the kiss while Guillermo just stood there stunned at the onslaught of affection. Once Nandor broke the kiss and rested his forehead on Guillermo’s all Guillermo could muster was “Hu-hum? W-what?”

“You are so gorgeous Guillermo, so strong, so marvelous” Nandor paused for a second staring at Guillermo like he was the most valuable item he ever pillaged “I can’t wait until you and I are in front of that online minister,” said Nandor, his voice dripping with love and desire, as he slowly caressed Guillermo’s cheeks with his thumbs. To that Guillermo could not say anything as Nandor’s declaration had knocked the wind out of his lungs.

“Now let us take a look at this paperwork,” said Nandor as if he hadn’t just drowned Guillermo over with a high amount of affection. Throughout the whole process of looking at the paperwork, Guillermo did not loose focus on Nandor’s face once. This was the man loved for years, this dumb, handsome, strong, confident, funny, dumb vampire was soon going to be his husband; that strong jawline, those beautiful eyes, that killer smile, those sweet lips, that cute laugh, he would get to keep that and more forever. Suddenly he felt a nice warm feeling spread all over his body, all the stress he felt dispelled in an instance. Guillermo couldn’t wait for the wedding day. 

The time was 9:30; the guests, human, familiar, and vampire, were seated in the yard where it was decorated like a Victorian funeral on steroids, Guillermo’s mom had made a somewhat judgmental remark about the decoration style to her son but she also added where there were lots of flowers there was lots of money so she was more than pretty okay with the match. In front of the aisle waited Guillermo dressed in the fourth fanciest clothes Laszlo owned, the first had a black big ruffled lace collar and wouldn’t let him turn his head to the side to see Nandor approaching looking like a gorgeous Persian king holding a large bouquet of roses. The image that both men witnessed was enough for them, if they suddenly went blind, they would be fine knowing what they last saw was their soon to be husband looking more magnificent than ever. Nandor almost glided down the aisle and devoured Guillermo with kisses but the constant stare of Guillermo’s family, especially his crazy grandma, kept him very grounded. Once he finished walking down the aisle, he stood in front of Guillermo enjoying the view in front of him while Nadja and Laszlo stood next to him and Colin Robinson, decked out like Dracula, stood next to Guillermo. With a clear of his throat the minister, a former familiar turned by Guillermo, started the ceremony “Dearly beloved we are gathered here today err -night to witness the union of these two vampiric men in holy matrimony” he tried to choke out the word holy as best he could without gagging “now it is time to exchange the vows, Guillermo you may start”

“Nandor, I came to you over 10 years ago looking for something, trying to become someone, someone I thought I wanted to be for so long. To me, you were that someone I wanted to be but as time went on and I grew up, reality hit me, and I realized I didn’t need to become that thing, I was fine being what I was. But I also realized that I didn’t want to be like you I wanted you. I wanted to spend the rest of my time being with you whether it was as your friend or preferably as your lover, and now I can’t wait to spend time with you as your husband”

“Damn” whispered Laszlo as he tried to blink away the emotional outburst from his eyes, Nadja quickly handed him one of the handkerchief she had stored for weepy guests.

“Nandor, on to your vows,” said the minister 

“Guillermo, I had a lot of people in life, lots of lovers, people that served me, a nice horse. All of these people left me without a single goodbye, and I was heartbroken, I had to learn to distance myself from the heartbreak by distancing myself from people. Then you showed up and you made me want to become closer to you and that scared me, so I made it hard for you to get closer. But you relentlessly fought to stay closer to me until you broke through the barricade. And for that, I thank you, my love. I know that in the past I’ve hurt you and I promised myself since... that day I would train myself to become the man you deserve. Now here I stand before as your equal ready to start my life again with you.”

“Wow…” the minister cleared his throat feeling a bit emotional and continued “Guillermo de la Cruz, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold in sickness and in health?”

“I do,” said Guillermo feeling like he was on fire, but in a good way. Colin Robinsons gave a little congratulatory pat on Guillermo's back

“And do you Nandor, soon to be de la Cruz, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold in sickness and in health?”

“Is that question really necessary? I mean we did the whole process; I obviously want him to be my husband” whispered Nandor to the minister feeling a bit impatient, he really wanted to get to the kissing bit especially when Guillermo was looking so delectable.

“I don’t know I mean I read the speech of a pdf I found on Google, but I guess” responded the minister in a quiet voice.

“Very good then, I wholeheartedly do!” said Nandor in a loud voice; if he had his way, he would shout out his love for Guillermo for all of Staten Island to hear.

“Alright!!! Well by the powers vested in me by the certificate I got from a government-backed website, I now pronounce you husband and husband, you may now kiss your man.”

Nandor put his hands on Guillermo’s shoulders, he was far more nervous than when he first kissed him, but he was also losing patience at the fact that he couldn’t kiss his lover. Guillermo was also impatient, Nandor looked the most beautiful he ever had, and he wanted to get his hands all over that tall drink of blood. Swiftly their lips met, and they were both hit by what they could only believe was happiness, pure strong swift, and also the sound of Laszlo banging two pots next to them. The kiss was soft and full of adoration, they both felt like they might float away at any moment. Once they parted all their senses were synced only to each other; all they could see was each other, all they could feel was each other, all they could smell, and all they could taste was each other. They couldn’t, however, hear each other as their ears ringed with all of the applause, the cheers, the intoxicating happiness, and the banging of the pots.

Nandor and Guillermo were both outside saying goodbye to Guillermo’s parents; his mom hugged him for over 10 minutes, both of them sobbing quietly as she was giving him her blessings, her cross burnt Guillermo slightly but he didn’t mind. Once his family was gone Nandor put his arm around Guillermo and guided him back into the house; they were both going to sleep for the rest of the day or the rest of the year, whichever. The reception had been quite the spectacle, for the most part, there had not been any problems and everyone had fun; Guillermo’s family danced the place down and were friendly with the vampires, but their crosses set the mood kind of tense for the undead guests. Nadja had to quickly run around giving handkerchiefs to so guests who were crying after hearing the speech Guillermo's dad gave to the happy couple, she had to go buy more as everyone cried during the mother-son dance. Things turned more festive when it was time for the bouquet throw and all the single people lined up, Nandor had never seen a human woman successfully body tackle a vampire just for a flower arrangement but it would explain why Guillermo was so good taking down a vampire when he was a human. Nandor wished he could have met this so-called VanHelsing before he was driven away by the peasants, with his secret strength techniques Nandor could have been a more powerful conqueror than before but having a sweet little morsel of that terrifying bloodline was somehow even better, especially if that morsel looked like his Guillermo.

Slowly they walked up the stairs to their room, they met Colin Robinson in the hall, but he was tired so he didn’t say anything, he just gave the couple a slight nod; weddings between two people that genuinely respected and loved each other weren’t a good feeding ground but he did feast a little on two of Guillermo’s relatives who were gossiping about another person’s husband. Once the happy couple reached their room Guillermo opened their big coffin and softly lugged himself in face down with a groan, Nandor looked a bit nervous at Guillermo’s behavior.

“My dearest darling, are you feeling okay? Do you need some blood?”

“No, no, no, no, it’s just that I am so tired; I could sleep for a century”

“Well I would agree with you, but we still have to put the decorations away”

“Oh, don’t remind me Nandor, can’t we just leave it for another day? Please I just want to sleep all day next to my husband” whined Guillermo unable to see what that magic little word did to Nandor, fiancé sounded good but husband? He felt as if he could pick up one of those yellow boxy trucks and yeet it all the way to city of New York. Suddenly Nandor jumped in the casket and threw himself over Guillermo wrapping him up in his arms. Guillermo yelped in surprise and for a second, he worried Nandor was going to break the coffin. He got a bit angry at Nandor’s stunt.

“Are you out of your mind?!” screamed Guillermo, they had only been married for less than 10 hours and they were already going to fight? Colin Robinson better not be on the other side of that door.

“Hey! What is the problem I was just doing what you talked about? I too want to go to sleep all day with my husband as well” said Nandor giving Guillermo a playful grin. 

“It’s going to be pretty fucking hard to sleep with a broken casket,” said Guillermo still a bit angry but also very happy. 

“It didn’t break Guillermo, besides if we can’t sleep, we can do another bedtime activity” purred Nandor wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Guillermo frowned in embarrassment, not because he was angry at Nandor but at himself, he let this man get away with his nonsense jut because this tall vampire smiled at him a little and said some sweet things. Still embraced by Nandor. Guillermo smirked a little and wrapped his arms around Nandor’s shoulders smooching him softly.

“Luckily, the coffin isn’t broken so I guess the only bedtime activity we get to do is sleep,” said Guillermo not letting Nandor completely of the hook.

“Your definition of lucky sounds quite wrong to me Guillermo, but I can make peace for tonight,” said Nandor a little bit bitter, they hadn’t had an opportunity to have some real private time. He wished he had chosen Colin's basement room but knowing his roommates they would find a way to bother him regardless.

“Hmmm, well you don’t have to worry too much about that. I have a surprise for you” said Guillermo with a playful hint to his voice 

“Really? “

“Yup, but we can talk about it tomorrow or next week, whenever we wake up,” said Guillermo closing the lid and flicking his hand, turning out the lights.

In total darkness and some relative privacy Nandor suddenly felt all serious and emotional, he caressed Guillermo’s cheek slowly.

“I’m so happy I found you in that Panera Bread, never in my life have I ever felt so grateful for bread.”

“Then I’m so happy for minimum wage and the dwindling economy because that’s what drove me to that Panera Bread,” said Guillermo with a laugh

“Yes, let us rejoice for this minimum wage and dwindling economy,” said Nandor planting a kiss on Guillermo’s lips. Nandor pressed his lips a little bit harder drinking in all of the softness and love he could. Guillermo hugged Nandor closer as he hummed happily into the kiss, this man was his husband forever and ever and ever, all that familiar work seemed nothing compared to the immense payout he just got, and becoming a vampire was pretty sweet too. 

“I can’t wait for the honeymoon,” Guillermo said unconsciously, the lack of sleep and the abundance of stress was already making his brain crash.

Nandor’s response to that was smoothing Guillermo’s hair and planting a little kiss on his forehead. Nandor wriggled himself a little bit closer to his lovely husband. Husband what a wonderful and fitting word, what a perfect word for Guillermo; no other word could ever fit him as well as husband. As sleep was clouding Nandor’s brain he suddenly thought on something Guillermo said; what exactly was a honeymoon?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, it took me way too long to write this. The next and final chapter is the honeymoon. It's not going to be as saucy as I wanted it to be because I can't write stuff like that without it sounding too stiff and awkward but I'll try my best to deliver that sweet Nandermo content.


	3. Guillermo Dear, Where Are We Headed?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guillermo rents a house for the honeymoon.

As Guillermo drove down the road Nandor wondered where could they be headed; they've been driving for a whole two hours and Guillermo had not given any hint on their location and Nandor was getting restless, he didn't like being cooped up in a car, it was like a torture box with all the windows. Noticing Nandor’s discomfort, Guillermo took his hand and started kissing it. This comforted Nandor a lot for the rest of the car ride, his Guillermo wouldn’t make him go through something uncomfortable; he decided to sit back and enjoy the feeling of Guillermo’s lips on his hand.

After a few minutes Guillermo perked up meaning they arrived at their destination, Nandor looked at where they were headed and was surprised to see an old but well-kept Victorian house; the windows had heavy curtains, he liked that. Guillermo got off the rental and went to pick up the suitcases as Nandor observed the house.

“Do you like it? It was a bit expensive to rent out, but they gave us a honeymoon special, it took me a while to find a place that had specific amenities like blackout curtains, a dark basement, coffins, and a pool. Funnily enough, finding a rental with a big pool was harder than finding some with coffins, New York is weird.” Said Guillermo furrowing his eyebrows; after extensive internet searches, Guillermo realized that vampires were the least disturbing thing on Staten Island.

“Guillermo this is lovely, a bit tasteless but nonetheless it is a nice surprise” Nandor approached Guillermo then put his hand on Guillermo’s cheeks.

" Well I thought we deserved some time alone, so I rented it for two weeks so…" Guillermo stopped and averted his eyes slightly, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed at the thought of them being together alone for two weeks 

"So?" repeated Nandor, he was confused at Guillermo's timid behavior, he knew by now Guillermo had grown a confident attitude. Nandor got closer to Guillermo’s face while squishing his cheeks and asked, “Is there something wrong, my little piñata farmer?”

If Guillermo could have blushed, he would have. Nandor looked at him a bit confused until Guillermo pulled Nandor's hands away from his face and pulled him inside the rental house.

“Not bad” admired Nandor, once inside he looked over the decor with some amusement, the decoration was a bit more theatrical and thematic than the antique organic feel to his home; it was a more gothic haunted house, but it was bearable nonetheless and he liked those really thick black curtains, he would have to buy those.

While Nandor judged the owner's taste in wallpaper and picture frame choice Guillermo went around the rooms, making sure everything was in working order. He paused for a second when he came to the master bedroom. He looked at that big canopy bed and felt goosebumps run through his body as he imagined what those days might be like, he and Nandor had a few moments that got pretty steamy but it never went past that as the lack of privacy in the house didn't allow for something more in-depth. Although Guillermo was braver than before he was not comfortable with having his and Nandor’s sex life out in the open to their roommates.

He felt nervous again, for a second, he wished Colin would have joined them as he suggested. Uck! Guillermo could not believe he thought that how nervous was he that he'd rather be around Colin than spend some alone time with his husband? Guillermo was so disturbed by his thoughts that he didn't sense Nandor walking behind him with the suitcases. He gasped in surprise when he felt two arms wrap around his waist

“What are you thinking of Guillermo? If the decoration of this room is unsuitable for you, we can leave all the lights off” They could technically see in the dark but at least it could mask it.

“No, I'm fine, I was just admiring this bed,” Said Guillermo, a bit nervous and Nandor’s strong arms weren't helping him feel calmer.

“It is a really nice bed,” said Nandor purring into Guillermo’s ear causing Guillermo to feel something warm take over his stomach, he then looked at his feet. Nandor noticed the change in his husband.

“Guillermo I can sense something is off with you ever since we got off the car, if it's the price of the rental it's okay I always have some money lying around.”

“It's not the money, I guess I'm just nervous about the honeymoon”

“Yes, the honeymoon… I'm going, to be honest here Guillermo I don't know what a honeymoon is?”

What?” Guillermo stopped staring at the floor and turned around in Nandor’s arms to face him. How could he not know? He knew Nandor was oblivious, but he was still shook.

“I thought maybe it was an astromonical event”

“Astronomical”

“Yes, astronimical, like an eclipse until we got here and realized it was like a vacation or something but is it not that?”

Guillermo looked at the floor again with more intensity, how exactly was he supposed to tell his husband what a honeymoon was?

“Dearest Guillermo you know you can tell your love bat anything,” Nandor said in that husky tone that made Guillermo want to lose consciousness.

“Right well… a h-honeymoon is like… the couple’s first-night t-together Y’know” stuttered Guillermo, about to explode of embarrassment but somewhere inside him he thought that energy should be put to better use.

“No, I sadly do not follow-oh!” Exclaimed Nandor as Guillermo pressed himself closer to his body while planting a supple kiss to his bearded jaw.

“Guillermo!” Nandor exclaimed in mock surprise, Guillermo’s head retired back to its original position, feeling happier.

Nandor was amused, not at his Guillermo’s bashful behavior, but rather at his boldness; meek little Guillermo who would freak out at the mention of sex, rented out a private love bungalow; he went as far as to bring blood packs plus he also made sure the rental provided coffins and no sunlight; most importantly he wanted absolute privacy, who knew Guillermo was such a cheeky little virgin .' Not for long’ said a voice in his head and Nandor agreed with this voice, and he showed it his support by grabbing Guillermo’s legs and back, carrying him bridal style to the bed. With treasure at hand Nandor ceremoniously jumped on the bed

“Nandor! If we break anything, we have to pay for it!” exclaimed Guillermo, more happy than angry.

“Oh, then we should test this bed to make sure it's extra strong” breathed Nandor closing in on Guillermo's face.

“Test the bed, that's what we are going to call it now?” joked Guillermo while rubbing his nose with Nandor’s. He was still nervous but Nandor’s humorous behavior calmed him down a lot.

“Maybe, does it sound sexy?” whispered Nandor planting kisses on Guillermo’s cheek

“We’ll see” hummed Guillermo while caressing Nandor’s nape sending shivers down his husband's spine.

Nandor kissed from Guillermo's cheek down to his neck where he stayed; after Guillermo became a vampire Nandor had an attachment to his neck, anytime Nandor saw Guillermo’s neck and collarbone his body was immersed with desire, a left over feeling from the turning. Nandor licked near the jugular vein, his favorite spot on Guillermo’s neck; it was where he bit Guillermo. Remembering that moment moved him and from licking he started kissing enthusiastically, making Guillermo whimper. Guillermo was in cloud nine but that didn't stop him from undoing buttons and unbuckling belts, all the lack of nerve was gone and it was replaced by passion, Nandor stopped kissing a minute surprised by two hands unbuttoning his trouser; a growl rippled through his chest and he literally tore their clothes off. He stopped for a second admiring Guillermo’s naked body, observing every nook and cranny of Guillermo, memorizing all the moles and faded scars he would kiss later; Guillermo had never felt so idolized and adored, he felt like a priceless work of art under Nandor’s intense stare. Guillermo was also getting an eyeful of Nandor, he had seen his husband's naked body before, but he felt like he was truly observing it for the first time. Every time the couple had gotten to this point, they were interrupted and had to stop but there was no Colin Robinson to stop them now. They took their sweet time looking at each other admiring every inch of their body until it became too much for them to endure.

Nandor swiped his tongue over Guillermo's body, from his thigh to his neck, nipping skin here and there between licks. He ended by grazing his tongue over Guillermo's lips and went in his husband's mouth savoring every taste and noise his Guillermo made. He stopped kissing Guillermo’s lips and gingerly took off the obstructing glasses putting them aside. He pressed his lips towards his small husband’s ear, his hands dedicated on touching whatever his tongue didn't. He breathed heavily into Guillermo's ear" If you were alive during my reign, my love, all of my wives would be trying to kill you." 

And the moment, sexual desire included, was gone; Guillermo blocked Nandor’s onslaught of passionate kisses and caresses and sat upright looking at his husband with creased brows and a hand on his hip. 

Nandor looked at Guillermo with confusion and lots of panics, maybe he didn’t like his tongue work or the way he used his hands? Stupid cocky handsome warrior man, Guillermo was a virgin, and even though they had enjoyed sensual times together Guillermo was obviously not used to such top tier skills.

"Did I do something you weren’t ready for? I’m sorry dearest sometimes I forget your lack of experience. Just tell me what you disliked, and I will refrain to do it"

“No sweetie, everything was more than fine"

“Why did we stop, then,” asked Nandor, feeling irritated, he finally had Guillermo for himself and he was stopping. Voluntarily.

“Because... that quip about your wives plotting to kill me. I mean why would you say something so ominous???” said Guillermo, feeling the most confused he had ever felt before.

“What do you mean? I was saying some spicy sexy words” Defended Nandor oblivious to Guillermo’s internal exasperation, in what era was **that** considered sexy?!

“Sweetie, I know you meant that to be a turn on and I’m sure if I would have been alive when you were alive, we’d be saying and doing many other things to each other. But since we aren't back then, here’s a tip when you are talking to me, your new spouse, please don’t mention your former spouses wanting to kill me.” At the moment Guillermo could not understand how this man had managed to have 37 wives at once.

“You did not understand that? Actually, now that I think of it some of it might have been lost in translation. Well I'll try to explain it as best I can, okay?” at Guillermo’s semi-skeptical nod Nandor explained “ When I was the leader back home I had to spend equal amounts of time with my wives and concubines, impartiality and all that,” said Nandor inching closer and caressing Guillermo’s thighs 

"Right," Guillermo said, less skeptical and more open to Nandor's touch.

“But when I’m with you and you are like this there is only you to focus on, and had I known you before I would neglect anyone and anything that wasn’t you or John, but I’m sure he would understand if I spent more time with you,” whispered Nandor on Guillermo’s ear while he touched Guillermo in a few more sensitive places, he felt delighted at his small husband’s shivers.

“Keep going,” Guillermo said as he wrapped his arms around Nandor’s shoulders, enjoying the feeling of his husband’s strong hands on his body.

“My wives, driven by jealousy and loneliness would plot ways to kill you”. By this time Nandor was slowly laying Guillermo down on the bed

“Uh-huh…. sure jealousy,” said Guillermo rolling his eyes, still clinging to Nandor softly kissing his lips.

“Oh, my dearest husband if I had you in my prime only you would be next to me morning noon and night,” Nandor pulled Guillermo toward himself, hoisting his short husband’s legs around his waist.

“And I would have the biggest room?” said Guillermo with a flirty tone, this made Nandor react positively, he bent down and started to lick and bite again. 

“There would be no need for you to have one Guillermo, you would have been in my quarters even when I would be pillaging faraway lands,” said Nandor between nips and licks trailing down on Guillermo's body with a snail pace.

“Go on,” said Guillermo, sounding a little bit strained, trying to unsuccessfully choke down a moan. Nandor liked that sound, he liked that sound a lot.

“When I would return after months of pillaging I would have spent days, month, or years locked up with you enjoying every little bit of your skin, your scent, your taste, your voice, your everything ” hummed Nandor looking at Guillermo’s eyes as he went a little bit south of Guillermo’s torso. Guillermo couldn't keep up with his husband's gaze as he threw his head back and let Nandor have an earful of his approval. 

Nandor was going to show Guillermo a new definition of lip service. Sadly, he could not keep his promise about furniture, not if Guillermo kept saying the name “Nandor” in such a lewd manner. He did not give a shit if he had to pay extra fees, he would break every piece of furniture they could fit on if it meant seeing Guillermo arch his back and make those noises again and again. Now Guillermo could understand how Nandor had 37 wives at once or rather he tried but he was too busy trying to breathe properly; Nandor was milking this experience for all its worth and was using every tool at his disposal. The last thought Guillermo had before completely losing himself to Nandor and the indescribable sensations crashing over him was the realization that he had rented the place out for two weeks.

Guillermo laid on top of Nandor, his gaze still glazed over the multiple events that transpired in that bed, he was surprised at how much of himself he didn’t know, how much stuff he could endure and how much he thoroughly enjoyed. However, Nandor didn't notice his small husband going through a mental journey of self-discovery, he was just glowing with newlywed bliss. Oh, if he could travel back in time and kick his own ass into falling for Guillermo sooner those 11 or so years wouldn't feel like such a waste, he could have enjoyed Guillermo more if he wasn't such an asshole. No matter they had an eternity to enjoy each other, but that little voice in his head said they only had two weeks alone, once those weeks were up it was back to the house of no privacy, population: the most nosy and noisy roommates in all of the Northeast. Surely Guillermo would get sick of living in such a home and he would leave. No! Nandor tried to quiet down that voice by thinking back on his best memories with his sweet husband. At the same time Guillermo decided that he had enough of soul searching and decided he needed a bath, the place offered complimentary spooky-themed bath and shower items and he was looking forward to relaxing after months of non-stop hard work. When he got up towards the bathroom Nandor jumped up, did he do something wrong, or had he hurt his sweet Guillermo somehow???

“Guillermo dearest are you feeling alright?”

“Yes sweetie, I just need to take a bath”

“Is it a good bath or is it the bath you take to clean a feeling or something off” questioned Nandor with a little bit of alarm.

“It is a great big relaxing bath with a nice bath bomb, some aromatherapy, and my strong handsome husband,” said Guillermo, walking back to the bed and lifting Nandor’s chin up and gliding his thumb over Nandor's lip. Guillermo wasn't the only one who was confused with his body. At that moment Nandor was thankful for that bed for keeping him grounded because he felt like his whole body was melting and he was becoming a puddle.

Guillermo let go of Nandor’s face and walked towards the bathroom with a very lovestruck Nandor following behind. 

Inside the Victorian style bathroom in the, totally not authentic, claw-footed bathtub rested Guillermo and on top of him was Nandor, splashing and playing with the water still fascinated by the effect the eyeball shaped bath sphere had on the water

" Having fun there, sweetie? 

“I just can't believe they not only managed to get the dyes and scent combination correctly, but they got it to look like an eye. Is there a way we can get this once we get home?”

“Yes, we can buy these and many more, but please give it a few months our bank account also needs a rest”

“Oh” exclaimed Nandor, he never realized the wedding was going to cost that much even when it was at home.

“Tell you what once we get back home, we'll make a list of all types of shower and bath stuff “

“Thank you my sweet” hummed Nandor twisting a bit to kiss Guillermo’s lips. Guillermo raised his arm to caress Nandor's hair and he stopped to notice his ring, it was very beautiful, surely if he got it appraised it would have been a priceless antique.

“Nandor can I ask you a question”

“Any question you desire my sweetest dear”

“Where did you find these rings”

“Oh, it's not a very interesting story, I ripped them off from the corpse of my enemy and his lover after I destroyed their empire. I thought they were beautiful rings for a potential spouse.”

“Hummkay” hummed Guillermo not really caring anymore, he would talk to Nandor about the morality and ethics of stealing from cadavers later now he would just relax for once. Nandor stared at his husband for a minute, before turning around a bit and resting his head on Guillermo's chest; Guillermo just hummed and started caressing Nandor’s hair a bit

“Guillermo... I love you”

“I love you too Nandor”

“Guillermo if... we get to live together as long as Lazlo and Nadja...would you leave me one day if things got difficult? “

“What?!? No, I would never” Guillermo could not believe what he was hearing; his heart sank at the thought that Nandor spent all this time thinking such dark thoughts.

“But you did ...although I deserve most of it “

“You did deserve some of that, but I was … going through some things. Nandor, I will never leave you ever. This ring you stole from your enemy is proof of that.”

Nandor said nothing to that, but it did relieve him of some of the dark thoughts. Guillermo didn't like that, he hated when Nandor thought like that, but he also understood that losing everything from his country to his horse made Nandor an insecure creature. He wrapped his arms around Nandor and started whispering little things to make him know he was wanted.

“I will never leave you ever...mi amortcito lindo” softly murmured Guillermo kissing the top of Nandor’s head. Nandor hummed and wrapped his arms around Guillermo. That other voice in his head told him the first chance Guillermo had to escape, he would take it, but that voice got drowned out by Guillermo saying sweet little things in Spanish. Instead of listening to that voice, Nandor focused on Guillermo’s voice and he tried to decipher what few words in Spanish he could remember.

After an hour or so the couple got out of the or bathroom and headed to the room with the two people coffin to get changed and sleep a bit but as soon as they arrived and opened their suitcase they realized that allowing Nadja to pack one suitcase was a big mistake, “Wow, Guillermo I did not think you were into such raunchy things”

“This is not the suitcase I packed “

Guillermo knew there was a reason he packed another bag. The suitcase Nadja packed had what had to be Lazlo’s accouterments and some very tight pairs of pants.

“Then where is our other luggage?” asked Nandor, feeling a bit disappointed, he really wanted to see Guillermo wearing those pants, but he also liked seeing Guillermo in his current state too.

“Ugh, I think it's in the car aaand it's morning, mierda” spat Guillermo out after checking the time on his phone.

“Well what shall we do now, both of us naked and with a big comfortable coffin that can fit two people?” said Nandor slowly embracing Guillermo and wiggling his eyebrows.

“Subtle” answered Guillermo placing his hands on Nandor’s shoulders as he guided him down to the coffin.

The two weeks were almost up, and Nandor and Guillermo had spent most of their time together “testing” furniture, and occasionally the bathtub and coffins. In the living room chaise laid Nandor, only covered by a blanket that Guillermo put on him after they “tested” that chaise for durability, yet again. He was genuinely exhausted in the best way, he believed no vampire orgy could ever compare to this honeymoon, that being said he would gladly give up ever attending the orgy for a yearly honeymoon trip. He smiled at that; all those other vampires could bone themselves silly for all he gave a damn, he had his Guillermo. Where was his Guillermo?

Nandor sat up and looked around, and suddenly Guillermo came into the room dressed in one of those swimsuits that surfers wear and a bottle with a straw. 

“Hey sweetie, here I got you some blood” Guillermo bent down near Nandor and offered the bottle.

“Thank you, Guillermo,” Nandor took the bottle and sipped through the straw. Sambuca blood, his almost favorite, his favorite was tequila blood, but it usually made him drunk faster, so it was only for special occasions.

“Are you still tired?”

“Just a little sore”

“I'm sorry I should have been gentler,” said Guillermo rubbing Nandor’s arm, he didn't mean to go so hard but Nandor’s encouragement made him go a little wild.

“Noooo, it's okay Guillermo. I like it when you get rough with me” whispered Nandor, licking the blood of his lips seductively.

Guillermo sputtered a bit before clearing his throat and continuing, trying to ignore Nandor’s chuckle “Well... I'm going to take a swim but if you need me just call okay”

“Actually, Guillermo I do feel a little bit better,” said Nandor, not wanting to miss Guillermo in the water.

“You do?”

“Maybe not good enough to swim but I can lay down in one of those air-filled plastic lifeboats”

“Well if you say so, hold on to the bottle,” asked Guillermo as he bent down and picked up Nandor bridal style towards the bedroom to get a swimsuit on him, even though Nandor protested but they had already tried skinny dipping and as a result, they had to drain the pool to clean up the mess; that took two days of their vacation and Guillermo wasn't about to lose what little time they had left. Once Nandor had his swimsuit on, Guillermo carried Nandor to the pool where he was laid down on a giant black swan pool float then Guillermo dipped himself underwater.

Nandor observed Guillermo swim about the water, he seemed so happy swimming it made Nandor want to build a pool over that dirty pond back home so that Guillermo could be happy splashing about and if they ever got some time alone they could also skinny dip again, Nandor chuckled at that. Nandor was surprised at how much he could love all the different versions of Guillermo; he loved happy Guillermo, drunk Guillermo, bloody Guillermo(this version made Nandor feel horny), sassy Guillermo, sword-wielding Guillermo( this version made him feel really horny), businessman Guillermo, naked Guillermo(there is no need for me to explain how this Guillermo made Nandor feel), and now he loved swimming Guillermo as well. His mind began to wander at all of the new versions of Guillermo he would get to experience but, in his heart, and his mind, his most favorite Guillermo had to be husband Guillermo.

After a couple of laps later Guillermo decided to join Nandor on the giant swan, sighing happily he rested his head on Nandor’s shoulder.

“Are you happy?” asked Nandor lovestruck by how adorable Guillermo looked with wet hair.

“Is that a question really necessary?” asked Guillermo while tracing his finger on Nandor’s jawline.

“I suppose it's not my sweetest” answered Nandor grabbing Guillermo’s hand and laying a soft kiss on each of his fingers, he lingered on the ring finger smooching it with particular attention and devotion“Guillermo, do we really have to go home? Can't we just kill the owners and keep this house?”

“No, we can't honey, the owners have a son who's going to art college soon."

Nandor grimaced, intertwining his fingers with Guillermo’s. " Yeesh, the decorations and finishes are shit anyway".

Guillermo laughed at that remark, but his heart felt full at the idea that Nandor wanted to live exclusively with him yet something about leaving that big house made him feel a little sad.

“It would be nice to have a place to call our own, but I don't think I could ever leave our house. There are so many nice memories we made there” whispered Guillermo

“Ah...Our first day as master and familiar, that time we had to share a room because the house flooded, the first time we kissed, turning you into a vampire.” Said Nandor nuzzling his face close to Guillermo

“When you asked me to be your husband, our wedding,” said Guillermo, lost in Nandor’s eyes.

“Our wedding” repeated Nandor still clinging to Guillermo’s hand and rubbing his nose on Guillermo’s cheek, inciting a little giggle from him. Suddenly leaving the rental home wasn't so bad, sure the privacy would be missed but being together, even without the constant sex, was enough for the two.

Once the couple entered through the doorway of their big house, they both were hit with a sense of familiarity, they were home. The couple arrived a few minutes before the crack of dawn, so their roommates were already hunkered down for the day, Colin Robinson was attending random weddings down in Atlantic City. Entering their room, Nandor sighed in relief, finally in their own room; as Nandor was relishing in the disappearing homesickness Guillermo put away their suitcases placing Nadja’s suitcase outside the hall; he would give her that at nightfall.

“Ah finally at home” sighed Nandor as Guillermo walked behind him starting to change his clothes for the evening.

“Oh, how this brings me back, remember how I used to order you around?

“Yeah, it felt like forever ago” reminisced Guillermo, some of those memories were not so unpleasant anymore.

“I should have ordered you to give me a kiss before my slumber”

“I would have done it too.”

“Then if I asked you to join me in my casket and cuddle?”

“I would have gone in a heartbeat”

“Would you have spent the night with me, naked and sweaty?” asked Nandor intending to make Guillermo flustered.

“Of course, I would have... **master** ,” whispered Guillermo in a breathy tone giving Nandor’s ear a soft kiss. Nandor’s whole body stiffened up, he suddenly remembered all the times Guillermo called him “master” and he suddenly felt like he was blushing; ten years’ worth of “master” flooded his mind. Fuck, why did vampires ask their familiars to call them master? Why couldn't they ask them to be called sir or madam or something that wasn't so suggestive when it rolled out of Guillermo’s tongue? 

“Master are you feeling okay?” asked Guillermo, pressing himself closer to Nandor caressing his hair softly.

“Guillermo, I thought the honeymoon was over as soon as the married couple came back” Nandor’s voice was quivering slightly.

“Yes, but we still have to test the casket, master.” breathed Guillermo again tracing a finger slowly down Nandor’s side.

“I already tested by jumping in it and stood so I think it's okay” stuttered Nandor trying to regain control of the situation. He was a warrior after all, and he was not going to let his adversary win no matter how attractive and intoxicating he was.

“Maybe so master. But it’s important to be thorough. That's the difference between victory and defeat isn't that what you told me master?” this time Guillermo was done with subtle; he wrapped his arms around Nandor’s middle and hoisted him up.

With a sigh of defeat, Nandor resigned himself to Guillermo, truth be told Nandor didn't mind one bit it was his warrior side who roared in anger at how weak he became, that side was silenced by the warrior side who was horny and wanted to be taken by his sexy spouse.

Guillermo placed Nandor inside the casket and then he followed, straddling Nandor’s waist with his legs as he took off his glasses and threw them to the side; suddenly both of Nandor’s warrior sides were really quiet. Nandor himself was lost in a trance, maybe he hit that leftover Sambuca blood a little too hard because there was no way such a divine creature was currently kissing him with such passion; if there was a possibility this was a hallucination he was sure as hell he wasn't going to let it go to waste. He was going to kiss and caress this apparition all the way to sunset. As he was losing himself in Guillermo’s touch, he suddenly remembered something important.

“Hey, Guillermo dear,” said Nandor breaking off the kiss

“Yes, master?” said Guillermo making Nandor smile wholeheartedly, his non-beating heart bursting with love.

“Happy anniversary, my love”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading the final chapter !!!! I went hard on this one and will probably need to rest for a few days but I hope you guys enjoy it.


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